Turning 35: Reflections on Entering the Second Half of my 30s (Part 1)
Written January 31, 2026
In two days, I will enter the second half of my thirties.
I am now a little closer to my forties, than I am to my twenties.
Everest Base Camp, Nepal, 2024.
Turning 35 feels like a milestone. It is a different kind of milestone than turning 30, where I felt like I was leaving behind the carefree youthfulness of my twenties and felt a lot of grief and sadness about it.
At 35, I’m just five years away from my forties. And when you are in your forties, there is no going back. You can’t pretend you are a “girl” anymore. Nor would I want to be a girl.
At 35, I feel the weight of adulthood: how every choice seems to count more and carry consequences. Some choices are irreversible.
But adulthood also comes with gifts I didn’t know of in my twenties. I have a confidence in my abilities that is real now. There is no imposter syndrome or striving to become something I am not.
I am.
With nearly 15 years of work experience, I no longer second-guess my abilities. I can create so much of what I only imagined when I was 23 years old, a fresh grad, tinkering on my laptop.
I have so many of the skills I once dreamed of having. I am a professional. I am not an amateur anymore. I don’t need to “build a portfolio” anymore.
I can finally create professional-level work, and I don’t feel the need to prove myself anymore. That is a huge weight off my shoulders.
The Heart of Turning 35
Turning 35 feels like the true completion of all the twenties energy and the final receiving of the gifts I needed to receive from that era.
Turning 35 feels like the quiet, slow onramp into my forties, and the rest of my adult impact and purpose. Whatever I build from now on can stand the test of time, if I am intentional and thoughtful enough about it.
What were once fleeting sparks of inspiration are now currents of thought that been with me for a decade. The words already live in my bones, even if they haven’t hit the page yet.
Today, I carry a clarity about what I’m here to do on earth that I didn’t have before.
I feel the assignment that I would happily spend the next 10-15 years of my life completing.
I haven’t fully lived into it yet, I am only 35, after all.
But it feels really good, to sense the good things that could come out of the rest of my adulthood.
While my twenties are fully over, adulthood is just beginning.
But I glimpse how I have been prepared for a destiny that could take the rest of my life to fulfill.
California, 2019
Rereading My Old Blogs About Turning 30
I first started writing this piece a week ago.
The last few birthdays, I just passed through without all that much reflection. Not that I didn’t want to reflect, but from age 32 - 34 seemed to be filled with a lot of upheaval. I changed jobs more than once, took a sabbatical, did an MBA, looked again for another job, got engaged and married.
So the last few birthdays have been spent moving, packing, and planning for the immediate few weeks and months. I never had time to write or really think as much as I would like.
This birthday, I finally feel more settled.
Tim and I got married 7 months ago and we are finally starting to find our groove together, which is calming and relaxing my nervous system. The initial months after getting married have past and we have a better sense of our daily rhythms together. Even our social media has settled into its own pace, so that it doesn’t take up as much mental energy anymore.
Finally, can return to my personal blog and process things that matter to my heart.
As I enter the latter half of my thirties, I felt drawn to reread some of the blogs I wrote leading up to my thirries, to revisit what I felt then and orient myself for how I’d like to live the next five years.
From age 29 to 30 felt like a massive shift. It meant I would never win a “Top 30 Under 30 award.” All those dreams for my 20s? Accomplished or not, time was up.
I gathered up the blogs I wrote on this topic and gathered up my courage to reread all of them.
A misty morning, in Ontario.
all the blogs I wrote about turning 30
February 2020, written when I was still 29.
Moving Into The "Second Half" Of Life: The Soul’s Journey After My 20's
https://anitawinglee.com/blog/second-half-of-my-life
The Most Important Life Lessons I’m Bringing from My 20’s Into my 30’s
https://anitawinglee.com/blog/lessons-from-my-20s-into-30s
Body Image, Job Titles and Money: Things I’m Surrendering As I Prepare to Leave My 20s
https://anitawinglee.com/blog/letting-go-my-20s \
November 2020
What Turning 30 Means (To Me)
https://anitawinglee.com/blog/turning-30
January 2021
The 20 Biggest Lessons From My 20s
https://anitawinglee.com/blog/20-biggest-lessons-from-my-20s
I Think I'm Ready For My 30s. Almost.
https://anitawinglee.com/blog/ready-for-my-thirties-almost
February 2021
How Will I Make It Through My 30s?
https://anitawinglee.com/blog/hope-for-30s
February 2023
How I Will Navigate My 30s: Three Pillars To Guide My Next Decade
https://anitawinglee.com/blog/how-i-will-navigate-my-30s
There were three more blogs I wrote and did not publish in 2023. They were about how I felt in my early 30s and what I was looking forward to in the rest of my 30s. I reread those too.
5 Days Later…
I can hardly explain how what it felt like to read all of those. I thought I would be filled with sadness.
I look at all these blogs and — on a bad day, I see disappointment, I see lost, broken, discarded dreams.
On a good day, I see fulfillment, I see destiny unfolding, I see purpose growing, clarity and maturing forming.
It fills my heart so much to see all the things I thought about back then. I feel more fulfilled. More grateful for where I am now.
I see places where the language I used really helped me heal and grow. I remember writing certain sentences and feeling like, yes, this is exactly how I feel and what I need to say. Even if no one reads these words, it matters to me that I wrote this out and articulated it for myself.
I felt more whole, more integrated, for writing all of it out.
It is remarkable to think that even years after writing it, those sentences still hold their weight for me.
They mean even more to me now, because I have lived into what my younger self thought.
I started to take notes from each of the blogs as I was reading, but it became too much. My heart was exploding with gratitude, grief, awe and appreciation… so I will just leave these blogs here for you to read, at your own pace, if you feel called.
