How I'm Finding Purpose, Productivity and Creative Juice in the Pandemic
I have a bit more to add to my recent series on “The Christian Kaleidoscope”, but I’m going to take a break right and come into the day-to-day.
Here in Toronto, we are in the ‘third wave’: the third time that number of COVID cases has reached record heights and the government has closed up shops and made another stay-at-home order.
This posed a problem for me because I always feel a fresh wave of creative energy and a desire to be outside with the arrival of spring,. Ideas start flowing to me naturally and effortlessly.
Reframing Lockdown Life
About three weeks ago, I started to very cramped. There were few places to go, and I was hitting a mental rut from working from home for over a year. I could feel that my creativity for my day job was waning. And the thing with creativity is that you can’t pull it out of yourself. In my experience, the way to replenish your creativity, when it’s completely tapped out is, first, to rest. Get back to neutral, from -5 to 0. Then gently start seeking inspiration from fresh sources. I have to go to new places, read new types of books, look at different imagery for new neuro-connections to form, talk to new people.
Of course, thanks to the pandemic, replenishing my tank of creativity at the deepest levels is not as easy. I’m in the house 6-7 days a week. I don’t have as much headspace or bandwidth to read new books because of the books that I ‘have’ to read for my Mdiv courses. I’m barely interacting with co-workers, let alone new people.
This Easter long weekend, I knew that I could benefit from a full 4 days of mental rest, but still, I scheduled two long blocks on Friday and Saturday to work on an upcoming research paper.
When Friday morning came around, I could feel my spirit wanted to do some free thinking. So I gave myself 30 minutes. That turned in 3 hours of me sitting with my journal, watching the sunrise from my bedroom and asking God questions about what this season of my life is about. Saturday morning, the same thing happened.
I chose not to get frustrated about the fact that I didn’t make any progress on my research paper. This internal processing and seeking were important.
I’m so glad that I took (or that my soul makes me take) that time out. A question came to me, in my reflection, that has completely changed how I view the weeks ahead.
“What are the gifts of this lockdown?”
What are the things I can do now, especially because there is no stimulation?
Having no stimulation can be a writer’s dream. It means focus and concentration. But, as we all know by now, having no stimulation is also draining.
With my pen to paper and eye to the sky, clarity started streaming through. God spoke to my spirit.
Here was my process for finding a new sense of purpose this season, as well as some of my personal responses. Your responses, the things God wants to tell you will be different, and I do encourage you to take the questions away and reflect on them away from this piece.
1. Who am I supposed to become?
Who did God create me to become? How can I use this season to become more of that person? (And not a grumpy, frustrated, irritated version of myself.) If fire purifies and time solidifies sand into stone, what am I supposed to become?
(Don’t forget to take some time to receive answers of your own. Here are my responses, just as a sample and for inspiration.)
Me: For me, the answer is a writer. I have this deep inner knowing that I am supposed to write. I am supposed to keep honing this craft and sharing through words. It is not my only craft, but it’s definitely one that has blossomed over the last few years.
Anita, you don’t need to treat this as a “training camp” anymore. This, here, now, is your life and it is part of your great becoming.
2. What can I do Now?
What are the things I’ve always wanted to do, that I couldn’t do while traveling, that I can do right now? What are the things I’ve been putting off that I could start now?
Me: Order the ukulele. Last summer, when I was biking around my town, I happened upon a antique store that had ukulele’s hanging from the ceiling. I immediately went home and told my family that I wanted a ukelele for my birthday (which was months aways in February). As this spring rolled around, the thought came up, what about that ukulele? So I used the last bit of my birthday money and ordered a ukulele on Easter weekend. It’s only been 10 days since it arrived, but this ukulele has already brought me so much job. Playing this cheery instrument brings me forward and backward in time to Hawaii and campfires and community.
3. What can I change?
How can I change my life and environment now? What could I tweak about my daily life schedule and workspace that will bring me closer to Q #1 and #2?
Me: Fix up your writing routine and workspace. When I moved into this house, I had the sense that this is the place where I will write and video edit from deep stories. It’s my base to come back to when I’m winded from travel and need to process the tragedy, suffering and mystery of life on earth.
I’ve already made several tweaks to make my writing life flow better, but now I’m going to use this month of lockdown to take up a notch. I’ve implemented things like starting a new spreadsheet to track my writing, and using a “writing outfit,” a particular pair of pants and sweater I wear then I write.
Taking that time out over Easter to process and reframe my life has really helped me live in this third lockdown with a sense of direction and purpose.
One more thing - It’s not just about buying stuff or “accomplishing” more. In the process of reframing my life, I also spent time in appreciation and gratitude. I looked at how much I’ve grown since April 1, 2020, when I first moved into this house during pandemic lockdown #1. It now feels like I’ve gathered myself and I’m walking forward more complete, whole and integrated. Instead of being a fragmented version of myself, racing ahead while leaving important pieces behind.
If you find yourself feeling down and out during pandemic life, I encourage you to try the questions I mentioned above. Tweak and alter the wording as works for you, and wait for the ideas to come.
They most surely will.
Infinite Love,
Anita
